I had a very helpful phone call with one of my committee members today. She didn't help me find a clear argument, but she let me know that I'm not totally off track, I am looking at "interesting" material, and gave me some useful ways of re-thinking about my chapter. Looking at it now, it needs a full overhaul. It'll be better for it, but this is not just a few revisions but major, major re-working. All stuff that needs to be done, but man, I'm tired and don't want to do it.
My body is also clearly reflecting my stress levels. I started clenching my jaw and biting/grinding my teeth (when awake, not asleep) about a year and half ago. Sometimes it's better, sometimes it's worse. Right now? My whole neck and jaw are pretty tense. This summer I started breaking out in itchy eczema bumps all over my arms. ( I was convinced it was scabbies, herpes (thanks for that suggestion, sis), folliculitis, bed bugs, fleas, and god only knows what else). They were down for a while, but it's creeping back. Time to see the dermatologist and dentist again.
I know my challenges are small considering the daily life stress people around the world face. It's a pretty whiny/privileged stress that "thinking makes my teeth hurt!" boo fucking hoo. But there it is anyway.
So if you ever thought about going to grad school - save your body and your sanity, don't go.
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